Do not despair: God never gives up on the human family

This is a letter I wrote my grandson on that fateful day, Sept. 11, 2001.

Dear Connor,
Tonight I desperately want to hold you in my arms as tightly as I do in my heart. But we are divided by hundreds of wretched miles. I want to assure you all is well. But it is not. I want to convince you of a peaceful world. But I cannot.

Etched eternally in my heart is that evening when you were just four weeks old and the two of us were alone together on the deck. I held you close. I promised you I would cherish you until the moss settled on my eyebrows. I told you I would pray for you every day of my life. I vowed to invest my life in working with God and others in making earth a little bit more like heaven. I longed for you to experience a world free of violence, bitterness, prejudice, injustice and exploitation. I prayed you would enjoy a safe and beautiful life.

But tonight, pathos weighs on my soul. My dreams for you have been terrorized. On this dreadful night, I am crudely awakened to the reality that in your lifetime, humanity has failed you. During your 12 years, tens of thousands of innocent children and women have been raped, beaten and starved. Hundreds of thousands have been exterminated in the name of ethnic cleansing; harsh unrelenting genocide has swallowed up countless thousands in Africa. In your lifetime, we have built modern towers of Babel symbolized by technology and medicine, and yet millions are displaced and wander as rootless, homeless refugees. Connor, this is the world we are giving you, and it is a dismal, shocking contrast to my whispered prayer for you on the deck just a little over a decade ago.

When we talked on the phone this afternoon, I asked what you thought about all that happened in New York and Washington. You replied, “It is very disappointing.”

At first I was not sure the word “disappointing” was strong enough. But it is. The word “disappoint” literally means, “to fail to fulfill the expectation or hope.” That is what our world has done for you.

We have failed to fulfill what you have a right to expect.

So now what? You will hear angry condemnations. Some will denounce others because of their religion or nationality. Others will clamor for revenge. Connor, as your papa, let me offer you some thoughts on how to respond to your disappointment. Remember: God is terribly disappointed, too.

Jesus abhorred violence of all kinds, including the violence of discounting people because of their race or religion. Jesus condemned the violence of economic exploitation, but returned good for evil. Even for those who nailed him to a cross he prayed, “Abba (Papa!), forgive them, for they know not what they do.” This was not some soft, wishy-washy response. Jesus demonstrated that love is stronger than hate.

There are people of every religion (including Christianity) who distort their beliefs. All of the great religions of the world embrace justice, respect and love for God and others.

Do not despair. God never gives up on the human family. I won’t either. I pray you never will.

This is a time for prayer more than blame. It is a time for humility rather than arrogance or mere patriotism. It is a time to reflect on what God wants us to do differently as a nation. We are a violent people not withstanding the goodness of so many Americans. More than 20,000 people were murdered last year in our country by our own people.

Finally, let me tell you about some words that helped me when I was your age, when I wondered if a future could be possible with the threat of an atomic bomb. The words are by St. Francis, who was asked what he would do if he knew the world would end tomorrow. He responded, “I would go on hoeing my garden.”

What St. Francis means is that every day is so precious, we must live it the best way we can. Every day is a spectacular gift full of mystery and miracle to be relished and enjoyed. Connor, you do that so well! I hold you in my heart with as much love as any grandpa in the world. And I believe you and I can be partners with God in helping to fulfill his dream for creation and humanity.

Love, love, love,
Papa

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